February 5, 2009

Would you like parchment with that?

I know this story is a bit stale, but sometimes Dowd is so razor sharp she can almost make a banker bleed.

(Besides, will any of us ever truly be able to speak of commodes in this lifetime with thinking of John Thain, Merrill Lynch, and a $37,000 antique commode used purely for decorative purposes?)

Thain, in justification mode (as opposed to commode mode), displays all the intellect and personal insight of an amoeba:

"In an interview with Maria Bartiromo on CNBC, Thain used the specious, contemptible reasoning that other executives use to rationalize why they’re keeping their bonuses as profits are plunging.

“If you don’t pay your best people, you will destroy your franchise” and they’ll go elsewhere, he said.

Hello? They destroyed the franchise. Let’s call their bluff. Let’s see what a great job market it is for the geniuses of capitalism who lost $15 billion in three months and helped usher in socialism.

Bartiromo also asked Thain to explain, when jobs and salaries were being cut at his firm, how he could justify spending $1 million to renovate his office. As The Daily Beast and CNBC reported, big-ticket items included curtains for $28,000, a pair of chairs for $87,000, fabric for a “Roman Shade” for $11,000, Regency chairs for $24,000, six wall sconces for $2,700, a $13,000 chandelier in the private dining room and six dining chairs for $37,000, a “custom coffee table” for $16,000, an antique commode “on legs” for $35,000, and a $1,400 “parchment waste can.”

Does that mean you can only throw used parchment in it or is it made of parchment? It’s psychopathic to spend a million redoing your office when the folks outside it are losing jobs, homes, pensions and savings.

Bartiromo pressed: What was wrong with the office of his predecessor, Stanley O’Neal?

“Well — his office was very different — than — the — the general d├ęcor of — Merrill’s offices,” Thain replied. “It really would have been — very difficult — for — me to use it in the form that it was in.”

Did it have a desk and a phone?

How are these ruthless, careless ghouls who murdered the economy still walking around (not to mention that sociopathic sadist Bernie Madoff?) — and not as perps?"

Wall Street's socialist jet-setters

1 comment:

  1. Ahh yes: the Diva Dowd. When she writes well she's devilishly good; when she writes poorly she's simply good.

    She'd have sat well with Dorothy Parker, Alexander Woollcott, Robert Benchley and their ilk at the Round Table.

    "feckless financiers, gods of gold and their idols..."