August 22, 2007

The Wicker Man

Some most unfortunate turns of phrase in the reporting of this serious crime:
A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said today.

Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict".

The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation.

The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper.

"I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

5 comments:

  1. You are not going to believe this Caz, but I swear it's true.
    I read that story this morning and thought of you! Well, I thought of mentioning it to you, but got tied up and it slipped my mind.
    I did read that he was watching porn at the time of the assault.

    What's it to her, anyway, they were fuckin' estranged after all!

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  2. You are not going to believe this either, Caz, but I read this story and thought of you, too!

    Not really. I'm teasing. I don't associate you with stories of genital mutilation ;-)

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  3. Anonymous8:50 AM

    No I don't either cube, but our Caz has covered a couple of "Penis" stories before! That's what made me think of her.

    You have to admit, it was rather a bizzare way of showing ones displeasure with another.

    Lot's of pent up anger and unresolved issues there, I would think.

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  4. You may have noticed that I've gone to the trouble of adding a penis label, "penis chronicles", since men and their appendages are not uncommonly found in news stories.

    I didn't run with the dwarf who had his penis stuck in a vacuum, from the day before (part of a comedy act at the festival in Edinburgh?), as I thought that was unremarkable; happens all the time.

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  5. Anonymous12:04 PM

    Flambe phallis Batman! What next, corned cock and cold salad?

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