October 24, 2010

Clinton did use rubbers!

Contrary to all evidence presented in The Starr Report, Bill Clinton did use rubbers, albeit, one would suggest, unsuccessfully:
"Mr Clinton kept the codes, printed on a laminated piece of card, "rubber-banded to his credit cards", in a trouser pocket". 
As the story now goes, Clinton managed to lose the codes with which to begin the process of launching a nuclear strike.

Oddly, the Pentagon had no process in place to address the loss of Clinton's - or, we assume, anyone's - codes.  Apparently the masters of the nukes on behalf of the free world have never come across human error or foibles, or the unsafe nature of anything in or near Bill's trouser pocket.

We imagine that a process, or extra strength rubber bands, have been in place for subsequent presidents.


  1. I wonder if they were ever really lost. I suggest the possibility that someone with some sense simply decided that the last place you wanted a bunch of nuclear launch codes was in the hands of a US president.

    Let's face it, I wouldn't have let George W have control over the remote to my telly let alone the ability to wipe out the human race.

  2. Dan - my thought was that he'd "put it somewhere really safe, so it wouldn't get lost", as we all do.

  3. To heck with the nuclear strike codes! I'm more concerned about the credit cards - did he lose the one that draws on the U.S. Budget account?

    Although I guess that wouldn't be such a big deal, it'd probably ring up "denied."

  4. Dogimo - it looks as though they still don't have a process to replace the credit cards ... you can blame Bill for the GFC now, for real!