October 15, 2009

Mandatory cure for the wrong problem

In an ongoing series, drawing to your attention solutions to problems that don't exist, we bring you Exhibit 135896347218652347985:

US schools have a mandatory "zero tolerance" on possession of weapons on school grounds - expulsion or long term suspension is the punishment, even if the weapon is being brandished by a six year old boy showing-off his boy scout utility implement, (verdict pending) or a seven year old girl using a knife to cut out house windows in a paper creation (one year suspension).

Mass injuries by knife are not exactly a common occurrence, even in the US.

Of the hundreds of school children killed in the US each year, almost all are shot dead - same method used in mass killings.

It's a fork, it's a spoon ... it's a weapon?


  1. Anonymous9:31 PM

    Pens and pencils are weapons too, as such should be banned from schools - and long finger nails as well.

    Also computers should also be banned for you can use them to bash others across the head or use the cables to strangle people you hate.

    Also bottles should be banned for they can be broken and used to cut people.

    Just about everything in a school could be used as a weapon.

    BAN (zero-tolerance) all schools now and save our kids, that's what I reckon.


  2. You forgot to mention the agony and potential scaring of paper cuts Justin.